chaobell: It is Saxton Hale's garbage. He is already rich. (crap)

OH GOOD I FINISHED THIS BEFORE “MEET THE PYRO” DROPPED, GO ME.

So I’ve been playing a shitload of Mario Kart 7 lately and ever since I unlocked Shy Guy and heard all his little Shy Guy noises, I knew he and the Pyro would be BFFs.

Mirrored from Fire of Unknown Origin.

chaobell: (TF2 OTP)

Here, have some silly little doodles. (cut fer pix)

Read the rest of this entry » )

Mirrored from Fire of Unknown Origin.

chaobell: Pyro taking a walk, firing flamethrower into the air just because. (Default)
So I just plugged the TF2 comm... as the Scout.

Yep.
chaobell: (TF2 OTP)

So at the last possible second I decided that instead of doves, the Medic pony has parasprites (which he apparently figured out how to neuter).

Mirrored from Fire of Unknown Origin.

chaobell: (TF2 OTP)

I’ve been experimenting with drawing things, scanning the hand-done drawings, tracing them in Illustrator, printing them on bristol board or watercolor paper, and attacking them with markers/watercolors/crayons/all of the above. It works pretty well. The watercolors themselves are a no-name $10 set of 24 cakes I got because I wasn’t sure this getting-back-into-watercolors thing was going to stick, and they’re pretty good for cheapo cake paint, if a little more opaque than I like watercolors to be. I think I’m going to go get a proper set of real live paints in tubes this weekend.

Anyway. Being a staunch member of Team Pyro-Is-A-Lady, I love how pretty much the girliest hat in the entire game (except maybe the Medic’s geisha wig) is a Pyro hat.

Mirrored from Fire of Unknown Origin.

chaobell: (TF2 OTP)

(click to embiggen, it’s fucking huge)

Watercolor, ink, and crayon. There’s also a CG version I’m farting with; that one will get both RED and BLU versions.

I was going to put the flamethrower on her back or something and then went “o right, unicorns do magic and could probably make fire.” For the record, if I do any more of these, the Medic and Spy will also be unicorns. …yeah, I know, I have problems.

I probably should have made her say “hudda hudda hoof.” Oh well, too late to change this one now.

Mirrored from Fire of Unknown Origin.

chaobell: (TF2 OTP)

everything about this is wonderful

Mirrored from Fire of Unknown Origin.

chaobell: (TF2 OTP)

The scene: last night, someone wandered onto a new server I hang out on a lot, which is co-admin’d by the “Intarweb Boyfriend” and some other dudes I’ve played with a lot. Anyway, the dude that wandered in was sporting a seriously racist name which I will not repeat here.

Now. There is something you should know about the “Intarweb Boyfriend.” He is one of the most laid-back people you will ever meet. There are only three things I’ve ever seen make him rage:

1. Cruelty to animals
2. Fred Phelps/the AFA/other such homophobic douchewads

And…

3. Racist assholes.

So the second this asshole joined I knew shit was about to get good and kept one eye on the text chat.

“Intarweb Boyfriend” and his co-admin(s) asked the guy nicely to change the name. He didn’t.

So they started fucking with him. I was too busy trying to spam grenades at people and cap a point and not die to see what all they did, but I did happen to walk past the dude once and found him–racist-ass name still in place–frozen on the spot by the admins. I later heard they’d blinded him for a minute or so (out in the open where people could kill the shit out of him) and hit him with an effect called “drugs” which basically randomly tilts your view of the world all over the place and turns it pretty colors.

And still he would not change the name.

So finally, “Intarweb Boyfriend” changed it for him.

To which he replied (in text chat; look for the guy with the long gibberish name and a bad case of buttmad)


…and got in return a chorus of “u mad bro?” and “why you mad tho?” and “TROLOLOLOLO”. Apparently this was not the response he wanted, because then he ragequit. And there was much rejoicing.

Mirrored from Fire of Unknown Origin.

chaobell: (TF2 OTP)

How to have fun on Horbl Hotel:

  1. Roll Pyro. Do not equip the Backburner, you need airblast capability.
  2. Head to that pool that’s about halfway up the building. Or really, any ridiculously high point on the map, but the pool is my favorite. Or the Party Van.
  3. Wait for enemies to join you there.
  4. Airblast enemies over the edge.
  5. Watch enemies plummet to their death, or at least to their severe injury.
  6. Repeat until you get bored or dead.

How to have fun on Mario Kart:

  1. Roll Sniper, make sure you have Jarate* equipped.
  2. Get on top of the big building in the middle of the map by way of ramp or cannon. Go to one of the ledges with a “BLIMP RIDES” banner over it.
  3. Wait for blimp to cruise by.
  4. Board blimp. (warning: most of the time the blimp is neutral territory and RED and BLU ride around and have fun together. Sometimes it isn’t.)
  5. Stand in door, wait for blimp to pass over enemies.
  6. Use Jarate to simulate what every ten-year-old boy standing on something very tall with people below dreams of doing.

*Jarate is, to put it simply, a large jar of pee you throw at people… and that’s not even the grossest throwable liquid weapon in the game.

Mirrored from Fire of Unknown Origin.

lrn2play

Mar. 7th, 2011 12:53 pm
chaobell: (TF2 OTP)

Dear dude on TF2 that kept going on and on and on and on last night about how you have no respect for Backburner* Pyros or W+M1** Pyros or flare gun*** Pyros:

1. If a Pyro has a Backburner, don’t let her get behind you. This means you may have to take some responsibility for watching your own fucking six.

2. If a Pyro is W+M1′ing at you and you are faster, run away. If you are slower,  jump around as much as possible and spam rockets/grenades/boolets at her and find a health pack/find a dispenser/find some water/scream for a Medic. If you are another Pyro, I am guessing based on your whining about Backburner Pyros that you have the standard flamethrower. Airblast and run.

3. …you’re seriously complaining that a projectile that moves fairly slowly, will probably not kill you outright, and leaves a visible trail is overpowered. Really. Really.

4. This all happened on one of those servers where the map objective tended to be ignored in favor of KILLING ALL THE THINGS for lulz.

*the Backburner is an unlockable replacement for the standard flamethrower. It does more damage on a normal hit, and if you hit someone from behind it critical-hits.

**W+M1 = hold W (forward) and the primary mouse button (fire), which is what noob Pyros tend to do a lot. It is hard to resist the temptation to do this, because in the right environment and with a slow enough enemy it actually works.

***The flare gun is exactly what it sounds like. It probably won’t kill your target if they’re at full health, but it might make them stop what they’re doing and retreat and yell for a Medic or run for health or jump in the water.

Mirrored from Fire of Unknown Origin.

PSA

Feb. 23rd, 2011 08:54 pm
chaobell: (TF2 OTP)

…that’s actually more for my benefit than anyone else’s:

Mirrored from Fire of Unknown Origin.

chaobell: hahahahahah wait what were we talking about (silly)

How to have fun on 2fort:

  1. Be a Pyro.
  2. Come out of spawn, head for your sewers.
  3. Come out of base via sewers, cross under bridge to opposing team’s sewers.
  4. Sneak up to opposing team’s battlements.
  5. Set everyone on the battlements on fire.
  6. Run like hell while flaming Snipers and Soldiers and the occasional flaming Heavy are busy jumping off battlements into water or running back to spawn or dousing themselves with jars of Sniper pee.
  7. Repeat until opposing team catches on and sends someone to the sewers to intercept you or builds a sentry at the top of the stairs or something.

I swear I must have done this like five times in a row last night before they figured out where I was coming in and even then, I still set the Sniper on fire when he came down to try and catch me before I got to the battlements. I LOL’d so hard.

This was one of those servers where the actual map objective (Capture the Flag in this case) was largely ignored in favor of just running around and KILLING ALL THE THINGS, but it might make a nice distraction tactic during a game where people are actually going for the briefcases if the opposing team isn’t watching their sewers.

Mirrored from Fire of Unknown Origin.

chaobell: DASHING THROUGH THE SNOW, GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY (christmas)

God, I love Team Fortress 2.

I completely fucking suck at it, but I love it.

Last night I was playing on a server with a capture point game going in which basically nobody was even trying to capture any points, in which there was like a 7000 minute time limit, and in which people were pretty much just running around killing ALL the things for lulz and there was some dude hiding in a barrel and scooting around in it a la Solid Snake and there were presents flying around (some of which had bombs in them). And in which a guy killed someone else in such a way as to bounce him down a flight of stairs and then went “I WARNED YOU ABOUT STAIRS BRO, I TOLD YOU DOG” and the deceased came back with “IT KEEPS HAPPENING” as is only right and proper.

And then the Intarweb Boyfriend joined me there and set up a fucking sentry right outside the room where my team spawned.

The first time I left the safe confines of his group’s server where he was teaching me how to do things because the tutorial is basically “here’s how you use Soldier’s weapons, here’s a practice map, OK GOOD LUCK OUT THERE,” and joined an actual game I heard him go “ok the person who just joined plays at the pro level so don’t go easy on her!” He did this because he knew I had no microphone and had to type “HAY >:/” back. He did go “no, j/k, she’s been playing for like an hour but she’s picking it up really fast” so I didn’t go kill him immediately. Also he gave me Ze Goggles. (they do nothing)

Also I love that when you die, there are little signs that pop up pointing at your gibs. Here’s your head! Here’s your torso! Here’s your kidney! I got one once that just said “A piece of you!”

Mirrored from Fire of Unknown Origin.

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chaobell: Pyro taking a walk, firing flamethrower into the air just because. (Default)
wrist deep in puppet ass

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