How I spent last night

[chaobell]

1. Go to bed.
2. Tell cat to stop pawing at DVD shelf for no apparent reason.
3. Tell cat to stop pawing at wall for no apparent reason.
4. Tell cat to stop pawing at door for no apparent reason.
5. Let cat out of bedroom.
6. Let cat in bedroom.
7. Repeat several times.
8. Finally get cat settled down.
9. Sleep.
10. Be awakened by smoke alarm at 1:45 in the morning.
11. Levitate off bed, attempt to locate pants and not pee in them.
12. Exit bedroom.
13. Find no fire. Find no smoke. Find nothing even warm. Find smoke alarm still yelling its fool head off anyway.
14. Push button to make smoke alarm STFU.
15. Push button to make smoke alarm STFU again when it starts yelling its fool head off again two minutes later.
16. Remember neighbors who nearly set building on fire a couple weeks ago.
17. Go outside.
18. Find no fire or signs of such. Find two friendly stray kittens hanging out on balcony, as they do.
19. Pet kittens until heart rate returns to normal.
20. Go back inside.
21. Give smoke alarm hairy eye. It seems to have nothing more to say.
22. Realize I am not at all sleepy.
23. Start up Animal Crossing, shake money and furniture out of trees until about 2:30.
24. Go back to bed with bedroom-authorized cat, who has finally decided to settle his ass down.
25. Lay awake waiting for smoke alarm to start screaming again.
26. Finally fall asleep somewhere around 3:30.
27. Dream about fire.
28. Wake up.
29. Go back to sleep half hour before alarm clock goes off.
30. Drag ass out of bed, into shower, and to work.
31. Make mental note to bitch at apartments if smoke alarm does this again ever.

Originally published at Fire of Unknown Origin. You can comment here or there.