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I forgot to bring home the offering to the Cat Gods.

I appease them instead with tuna fish.

They seem pleased with my sacrifice.

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I also have Stephen King's book on writing, entitled...wait for it...On Writing.

A quote:

"Miss Margitan really had been hurt by what I wrote, and that much I could understand. I doubt that she hated me--she was probably too busy--but she was the National Honor Society advisor at LHS, and when my name showed up on the candidate list two years later, she vetoed me. The Honor Society did not need boys 'of his type,' she said. I have come to believe she was right. A boy who once wiped his ass with poison ivy probably doesn't belong in a smart people's club."

God, but I do so love Stephen King.