chaobell: Pyro taking a walk, firing flamethrower into the air just because. (penumbra)
[personal profile] chaobell
Anna, apparently, is a fangirl. Snip from Penumbra characterwank, in which Anna reads the response to a not-so-positive review she leaves a particularly unsavory fanfic.

Aside from the junk, there were a few posts to various mailing lists she subscribed to--one of which was in the midst of a full-blown holy war over some pretentious teenager's less-than-stellar piece of blatant self-insertion fan fiction and why it did or did not suck the big hairy one. Stemming, as Anna soon found out, from her own review of the thing.

>From: tarosgurl13@junotech.net
>To: warmasterfan-l@ezlist.com
>Date: 8/14/49
>Subject: Re: my 1st ficcie, no flames!
>
>On 14 Eighthmonth, 3049, anna@jsf.gov wrote:
>>
>>O...kay. I'm going to try to be as kind as possible here, but...
>>
>>First of all, I'm not entirely sure what language this is supposed
>>to be written in. When you're swapping e-mail and trading IM's,
>>it's perfectly acceptable to substitute "u" for "you" and "l8r" for
>>"later" and such. When you're writing a story, it isn't.
>
>well xcuse me 4 bein ORIGINALL.
>
>>Also, I think you should know that "alot" and "eachother" are
>>not words. There are spaces there.
>
>it taks to long to put spaces in. u no what i ment so y r u bein so picky??????
>
>>Spelling and grammar, or complete lack thereof aside, I'd like to say that
>>this is a very original concept and has a good solid story going, but I'm
>>afraid I can't. It is painfully obvious that the girl Taro saves, who later ends
>>up having all these MAD LEET SKILLZ, is a self-insert. Okay, all original
>>characters, in fanfic and original fiction, are sort of self-inserts to some
>degree, but this is ridiculous. I mean, when Okama-chan (uh, I'm not a linguist,
>>but isn't "okama" Natsuno-go for "homosexual?" I could be wrong here,
>>and no offense to any okama reading if I'm not, honest ^_^;; )
>
>NO IT ISNT!!!!!!!!! my bother told me okama means wolf he been to natsuno
>
>>first shows up, she's been mauled by bandits and left for dead, and Taro
>>comes along to save her and pet her and feed her and generally nurse her
>>back to health. Okay, that's cool, Taro /would/ come rescue a helpless girl.
>>What I take issue with here is a) Taro kicking Iria to the curb (I'm assuming,
>>as she's not so much as mentioned in this fic),
>
>thats bcuz iria is STUPID and UGLY and taro doesnt luv her!!!
>
>>b) Taro inexplicably falling head over heels for Okama after she tells her
>>life story about everyone in school hating her and her parents not buying
>>her everything she wanted, c) Okama suddenly becoming the
>>princess of Outland, the Four Territories, /AND/ Altaris AND just up
>>and sprouting all these super powers
>
>u didnt read it, she wuz ALLWAYS princes & she ALLWAYS had thos
>powrs!
>
>>and, last but not least, d) Taro suddenly becoming too weak to fight off
>>a tak-tak (A TAK-TAK, FOR GOD'S SAKE, A TAK-TAK IS FOUR
>>INCHES LONG OR DID YOU NOT PLAY THE GAME excuse me)
>
>no i didnt play the game sense when do u have 2 play a game 2 write a fic???
>
>>and Princess Homosexual coming to his rescue.
>
>I TOLD U IT MEANS WOLF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>
>>Look, I know you're young, and I'd like to give you the benefit of the doubt
>>here. First, you need to start paying attention in school. You're /paid/ to go
>>to school, fercryinoutloud, and I'm inclined to wonder if Mama J is not wasting
>>ten perfectly good ing a week on you. And second, and I'm sorry, but there is
>>just no delicate way to put this: please refrain from writing sex scenes until
>>you have seen an actual penis. Thank you.
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chaobell: Pyro taking a walk, firing flamethrower into the air just because. (Default)
wrist deep in puppet ass

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